News of the Weird, News of the World, News of…Whatever!

News of the Weird! Since it’s Friday…

In our never ending attempt to bring you the news from around the world that you may have missed, here is another bit of the written version of the famed last segment of our podcasts.

Story #1

The Kennedys would fit in perfectly in Australia.  Seems politicians in their most populous state have been voting drunk, so much so that they may soon have to take a breathalyser in order to vote.  At least they have that to blame for their stupid laws, all we have is stupid politicians.

Story #2

This one if from the “Really?!?!? REALLY?!?!” file.  A couple in Florida got into an argument over God knows what, but it ended with the man being arrested for assault with a hamburger.  It would seem this guy is a double jackass with cheese.  (Horrible pun, we know.)

Story #3

What do you get the person who has everything for Christmas?  Nothing, preferably.  But if you must get them something they may actually not have, how about something from the worst gift list, like the screaming rubber chicken or toilet putting kit?  Who doesn’t want to putt while dropping a deuce?

Story #4

Speaking of dropping a deuce, file this one under pain in the ass lawsuits.  A woman is suing a sports bar in New Jersey and a toilet manufacturer because her ass broke a toilet seat and she was stuck in the toilet itself for 20 minutes.  It took her 20 minutes to get her ass unstuck and 2 years to file suit.  The courts should flush this one, shit happens.

Story #5

Protect your head or the police will shoot you.  Police in Taiwan pulled their guns on a moped rider for not wearing a helmet.  This is the ultimate version of “If you don’t stop crying I’ll give you something to cry about.”


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