24
Mar
08

Stella Awards for stupid lawsuits: the Darwin Awards for idiots who don’t die.

If only we could get rid of the stupid people…there would be no Democrats.

Got this email forwarded over the weekend, it’s very funny and sad because it’s true. Considering the amount of money the Democrats get from trial lawyers, don’t expect this problem to go away any time soon. And check out the Stella Awards here for more information and to nominate an idiot, be they plaintiff, jury or judge.

It’s time again for the annual “Stella Awards”! For those unfamiliar with these awards, they are named after 81-year-old Stella Liebeck who spilled hot coffee on herself and successfully sued the McDonald’s in New Mexico where she purchased the coffee. You remember, she took the lid off the coffee and put it between her knees while she was driving. Who would ever think one could get burned doing that, right?

Here are the Stella’s for the past year:

7TH PL ACE :

Kathleen Robertson of Austin, Texas, was awarded $80,000 by a jury of her peers after breaking her ankle tripping over a toddler who was running inside a furniture store. The store owners were understandably surprised by the verdict, considering the running toddler was her own son.

6TH PLACE :
Carl Truman, 19, of Los Angeles, California, won $74,000 plus medical expenses when his neighbor ran over his hand with a Honda Accord. Truman apparently didn’t notice there was someone at the wheel of the car when he was trying to steal his neighbor’s hubcaps.

5TH PLACE :

Terrence Dickson, of Bristol, Pennsylvania, who was leaving a house he had just burglarized by way of the garage. Unfortunately for Dickson, the automatic garage door opener malfunctioned and he could not get the garage door to open. Worse, he couldn’t re-enter the house because the door connecting the garage to the house locked when Dickson pulled it shut. Forced to sit for eight, count ’em, EIGHT, days on a case of Pepsi and a large bag of dry dog food, he sued the homeowner’s insurance company claiming undue mental Anguish. Amazingly, the jury said the insurance company must pay Dickson $500,000 for his anguish. We should all have this kind of anguish.

Scratch. There are more…

4TH PLACE :

Jerry Williams, of Little Rock, Arkansas, garnered 4th Place in the Stella’s when he was awarded $14,500 plus medical expenses after being bitten on the butt by his next door neighbor’s beagle – even though the beagle was on a chain in its owner’s fenced yard. Williams did not get as much as he asked for because the jury believed the beagle might have been provoked at the time of the butt bite because Williams had climbed over the fence into the yard and repeatedly shot the dog with a pellet gun.

3RD PLACE :
Amber Carson of Lancaster, Pennsylvania, because a jury ordered a Philadelphia restaurant to pay her $113,500 after she slipped on a spilled soft drink and broke her tailbone. The reason the soft drink was on the floor: Ms. Carson had thrown it at her boyfriend 30 seconds earlier during an argument. Wha t ever happened to people being responsible for their own actions?

Scratch, scratch, scratch. Hang in there; there are only two more Stella’s to go…

2ND PLACE :

Kara Walton, of Claymont, Delaware, sued the owner of a night club in a nearby city because she fell from the bathroom window to the floor, knocking out her two front teeth. Even though Ms. Walton was trying to sneak through the ladies room window to avoid paying the $3.50 cover charge, the jury said the night club had to pay her $12,000….oh, yeah, plus dental expenses.

Go figure.

1ST PLACE : (May I have a fanfare played on 50 kazoos please)

This year’s runaway First Place Stella Award winner was Mrs. Merv Grazinski, of Oklahoma City, Oklahoma, who purchased a new 32-foot Winnebago motor home. On her first trip home, from an OU football game, hav ing driven on to the freeway, she set the cruise control at 70 mph and calmly left the driver’s seat to go to the back of the Winnebago to make herself a sandwich. Not surprisingly, the motor home left the freeway, crashed and overturned. Also not surprisingly, Mrs. Grazinski sued Winnebago for not putting in the owner’s manual that she couldn’t actually leave the driver’s seat while the cruise control was set. The Oklahoma jury awarded her, are you sitting down, $1,750,000 PLUS a new motor home. Winnebago actually changed their manuals as a result of this suit, just in case Mrs. Grazinski has any relatives who might also buy a motor home.

UPDATE: While funny, and seem like they could be true, turns out they’re not. http://www.snopes.com/legal/lawsuits.asp

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18 Responses to “Stella Awards for stupid lawsuits: the Darwin Awards for idiots who don’t die.”


  1. 1 Michelle
    May 11, 2008 at 10:37 am

    Alas…funny and iconic as these are – they are not true.

  2. 2 fadjkl
    December 15, 2008 at 4:42 pm

    how do you know michelle?

  3. 3 In Texas
    December 19, 2008 at 1:24 pm

    http://www.snopes.com/legal/lawsuits.asp

    There is a segment of our population rabidly against Americans having equal access to the courts and justice. They lie and mischaracterize so that the very ones they seek to harm will support their agenda. Ironically, these well funded malanthropes always try to characterize tort reform as something driven from a “grass roots” basis. Yeah, if by grass roots you mean large corporations, insurance companies, and others with a vested interest in not being held accountable. A shame considering that most businesses are trying to do things right and have to compete with those who want to do it wrong to shave a buck here or there.

    Many states already have limits on judgments for personal injury, venue shopping, even malpractice. Yet insurance rates have not gone down and none of the promised benefits occurred. But it did get harder for those harmed by the irresponsible actions of others to get any sort of relief.

    • 4 MakarovJAC
      May 11, 2010 at 12:30 pm

      Ok, your words sounds cool but if a caucasian retard spills hot coffe over her legs cause the ‘turd though it was a good idea to put it in there, it’s equally retarded and an utter waste for legal resources and freedom of rights to asume the ‘turd gets an award for its own idiocy from a totally unrelated source to the retarded event.

  4. 5 Spurwing Plover
    April 23, 2009 at 3:43 pm

    a accedent happens and the vultures and sharks are cirling already i mean its getting out of hand and we need common sense tort rform but its very unlikly with the demacreeps in charge

  5. 6 Amelia
    May 10, 2009 at 9:32 pm

    I’m absolutely sick of people trying to con people out of their money with stupid lawsuits! The most recent Miley Cyrus case especially has me fuming! An Asian is suing Miley for making squinty eyes in a recent picture! Furthermore, she is suing her for $4 BILLION DOLLARS due to civil rights violations! That is SO stupid!!! Americans do have freedom of speech and if you sued everyone who had pix online of them making squinty eyes, you’d be suing millions of people! Miley just gets noticed for her pix because she’s a celebrity!

  6. 7 Mad Bluebird
    September 5, 2009 at 10:22 pm

    Just as bad as that jerk who tried to sue McDonalds and Burger King blamming them for his obesity HE LOST,THE JUDGE SHOULD HAVE PUT HIM ON A BREAD AND WATER DIET AND HAVE HIM RUN 3 HOURS ON A TREADMILL

  7. April 27, 2010 at 1:28 am

    Oh my goodness…she made a sandwich…that is the most hilarious thing I’ve ever heard…

  8. 9 MakarovJAC
    May 11, 2010 at 12:25 pm

    This is the irrefutable proof that NORTHAMERICANS are retards by nature.

  9. 10 Alice
    June 25, 2010 at 10:12 am

    Shouldn’t we be looking at the jury that awarded the money? Or the judge, if no jury? These are the people responsible for the huge awards in the first place. It is the jurors that are either uneducated or think giving money that is not theirs to someone who was stupid is a good idea. These lawsuits only work because the judge or jury hands down the judgement. Plus the lawyers who will try anything for a few hundred thousand bucks. Stupid people only remain stupid with lots of help.

  10. July 30, 2010 at 11:01 pm

    You will be hard pressed to a new driver who qualified first buy a motorhome to find. This regulation has an impact on the cost of default insurance. In addition, although most vehicles in the United Kingdom belonging to a recreation very experienced pilots who know to be careful on the road and would not be surprised by most of the situations they face. In short, a boy racer and nervous, nervous drivers are not owners of homes.
    Another reason is that the campers led a different way than other vehicles. Obviously this does not refer to the actual mechanism of internal combustion engine, code or methods of the road and steering – he refers to the number of campers used and under what circumstances.

  11. October 2, 2010 at 12:40 pm

    How could someone obviosly that retarded get a licance in the first place ? Leave the drivers seat of a moving vehicle ….looser..

  12. 13 SPURWING PLOVER
    May 31, 2011 at 1:01 pm

    And the trial lawyers always support the demacRAT party in ever election the VULTURE,SHARK & DONKEY are partners in crime

  13. 14 michael
    June 10, 2011 at 5:10 pm

    be careful stella doesnt sue you for using her name for the awads. its a sad sad world out there. and i agree that the judges and jury are to blamee. im ashamed sometime.

  14. January 17, 2012 at 11:43 am

    certainly like your web-site however you have to take a look at the spelling on quite a few of your posts. Many of them are rife with spelling issues and I find it very bothersome to tell the reality on the other hand I’ll surely come back again.


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