Our winner this week could have easily been House Democrats for their taxpayer funded retreat to a luxury spa in Williamsburg, Virgina, but the fact that liberals look at tax dollars as their own money to spend how they like comes as a shock to no one. So, while totally douchey, not really DBoTW level of doucheyness.
Our winner this week is rabid environmentalist (and at least should be Katherine Hepburn impersonator) Robert F. Kennedy, Jr. When we say rabid environmentalist we don’t mean he wants to live by those standards, but we aren’t going to talk about his hypocrisy here. His offense is claiming that the pork industry is a greater threat to the United States than Osams bin Laden.
There are a million ways this is just plain stupid, just check the “Global Warming Myth” category on this blog for enough evidence to disprove that garbage. But to claim a food production industry is a greater threat to the United States than the leader of a terrorist network hell-bent on the destruction of the country is borderline “special,” if you catch our drift.
This really requires no comment, so we’re going to stop and just post the video below. The audio quality isn’t the best, but in the first 2 minutes you hear all you need to.
RFK, Jr., you may well be a nice guy, but you are a total douchebag. And this week, you are king. You are our Douchebag of the Week.
One last question, how did you offset the carbon footprint of the massive amount of K0ol Aid you’ve clearly consumed?
Our winners this week are the über left-wing group, Americans United for Change. They’re made up of the usual, trust fund suspects who seek to slam shut to door of success for everyone else by imposing socialism on the United States. That’s fine, they can lobby for what they refuse to live by all they want as citizens, but they’ve gone further than that.
Instead of lobbying on the merits of President Obama’s trillion dollar pork bill, mostly because there aren’t any, they’ve decided to make a principled stand by Republicans and the forgotten 11 Democrats (ever noticed they’re not mentioned often in news stories?) in a cause and an opportunity to attach Rush Limbaugh.
Why? Well, as was already stated, they can’t argue the merits of the bill. How could they argue spending $1.2 trillion in the hope of creating 4 million jobs? Since no one can say ANY jobs will be created, and there are payoffs to every left-wing cause in the bill, we’d be better served giving 4 million unemployed people $300,000 each, even though that would be a bad idea, too.
So they attack a talk show host of expressing his opinion.
If you ever notice, these left-wingers aways personally attack conservatives, seek to shut them up or shut them down. They support diversity of skin pigment and who you screw only. Think differently and forget it, they seek to destroy you. This is the real left, fascism by ”progressives.”
For their attempt to attack someone for expressing their opinion because they’re too cowardly to debate the facts, Americans United for Change are our Douchebags of the Week.
Picking just one Obama nominee for a cabinet post to be Douchebag of the Week proved to be impossible, so we’ve gone with two. While limiting it to just two wasn’t easy either, giving the award to all of them simply wouldn’t point out the extra douchebag yard these two went in order to win this week. Our winners are Attorney General Designate Eric Holder and Treasury Secretary Designate (for now) Tim Geithner.
First, let’s deal with Geithner. The man seeks to be the head of the Treasury Department, which means the IRS would fall under his control. Turns out he’s not very good at filing his taxes, owing $34,000 more than he has paid for the years 2001 -2003. It’s being called a “mistake,” and it probably was. But what does it say about our tax code that the man charged with enforcing the law can’t understand it well enough to follow it accurately? It would be one thing if he were advocating for flat-tax or something much simpler than we have now by saying, “It’s so screwed up even I can’t follow it!” But he’s not, he’s the guardian of the status quo, and for that he’s a douchebag.
Seriously, what’s next, the guy who writes the tax laws not following them? Oops.
Eric Holder is a douchebag not only for his anti-gun stance, but for his anti-free speech stance. What does that mean? In his confirmation hearing Holder wasn’t able to give an answer on the question of weather or not he supports the oxymoronically named “Fairness Doctrine,” the regulation that essentially makes unelected FCC bureaucrats program directors of every talk radio station in the country. Why couldn’t he answer a question that is essentially “do you support free speech?” with a simply yes or no answer? Because “yes” is popular with the uber-leftists, aka the Democrat base who seek to silence those who dare not kiss the feet of socialism and cherish liberty, but very unpopular with anyone who understands the issue. It’s dangerous to put someone in that position who refuses to clearly articulate unequivocal support for free speech, and submitting it in writing later only serves to allow nuanced finessing so as to obscure the true meaning. Dangerous, and douchebaggy.
Congratulations to both of our “winners” this week, you truly have outshined all the other douchebags up for cabinet posts. But don’t cry for them, they will undoubtedly step up their games in the future and win one of these for themselves. And we have a feeling this won’t be the last time we hear from you either. Well done.
The voting for this year’s DBoTY was very heavy, and close for a long time. But in the end, we had a clear winner(s) – Keith Olbermann and Chris Matthews of the left-wing PR machine known as MSNBC.
For a long time it looked as though Harry Reid and Nancy Pelosi were going to pull it off and take the trophy, but a massive push from voters in the last week put Olbermann/Matthews over the top by 5 points.
While it’s difficult to really say who was doucheier in a year filled with so much douchebaggery, the choice of Olbermann (or as we affectionately call him, Uberdouche) and Matthews is a solid one by voters. They took the once-great NBC News to new lows of media bias and PR hackery. No words we could ever write could to justice to the “thrill up the leg” comment, or any lie spewed by Uberdouche. So, instead of trying, we’re just going to give you a clip of each at their doucheiest.
And Uberdouche. No one clip can encapsulate the extent of his total douchebaggery, so here is just a minute of this asshole at work.
Congratulations to all our contenders and to our winners. We have a feeling a great many of you will be on the list for this year, too.
It’s that time again, time to look back at the year and ask you, our readers, who was the ultimate douchebag in 2008.
Just like last year, we make the nominations and you cast your vote. Winner takes all – the Douchebag of the Year Award. (See the winner last year here.)
Here are the nominees, and if we’ve missed anyone feel free to email us with why you think they deserve consideration. Post your choice or email your vote of nominee to contact@itsfirstfriday.com.
The “winner” will be announced on the first Podcast of the year and here then. And you can hear our choices and cases from them on the Year in Review Podcast here.
The Nominees for Douchebag of the Year 2008
Governor Rod Blagojevich. Being a corrupt Chicago politician is nothing new, they damn near invented the concept, but Blago took it to new levels and made the mistake of seeking payoffs over the phone. Douchebag!
Hank Paulson. Mr. $700 billion bailout himself sold the country a bill of goods based upon the need to buy distressed assets, then didn’t buy any. Where did the money go? We may never know, but he’s a douchebag.
Al Franken. The fact that Franken is a douchebag has been long-established, but this year he wanted to become a Senator so he could impose his douchebagery on the rest of the country. He lost, but is now busy trying to lie, cheat and steal his way into the Senate. What a douchebag!
Ted Stevens. Corruption knows no party, and Senator Stevens never met a home improvement payoff he didn’t like. The voters of Alaska had the good sense to throw this guy out of office, but that doesn’t change the fact that he’s a world-class doucehbag.
Jack Murtha. When not accusing the Marines of murder, Congressman Jack was busy calling his constituents racist rednecks. He must have been referring tot he man in the mirror. What a douchebag!
Charlie Rangel.The New York Congressman that writes the tax laws doesn’t want to follow them. Who does, really? But if you’re going to impose them, you damn well should follow them. And that was just the tip of his corruption that came out this year. Such a douchebag.
The cheating trifecta: Spitzer, Edwards and Mahoney.You know their stories, married men who preach “holier than thou” politics while dipping their pens in different inkwells, payoffs, hookers, lies. Total and complete douchebags.
Nancy Pelosi and Harry Reid. They could both easily qualify on their own, but together they are douchey force of nature. Whether its defending corrupt Democrats or complaining about the smell of the American people, these two led Congress to an approval rating just below that of the bubonic plague. Their douchebag street cred is beyond question.
Al Gore. While he wasn’t in the news as much as he was when he won last year, he’s still one of the all-time douchebags.
Barack Obama. Playing the race card when it suited him, hanging out with some of the great DB’s Chicago has to offer, and or product of that corrupt machine, Obama’s douchebagery may just be emerging. Time will tell.
Keith Olbermann and Chris Matthews. Uberdouche and Mr. Thrill Up His Leg spent the year cheer-leading for Democrats while claiming to be journalists. Essentially having a T1 line from the corrupt Media Matters feeding directly into their vacuous heads, they happily pounded the last nail into the coffin of credibility that holds the rotting corpse of NBC News.
UPDATE: Additional nominees.
Like we said, we knew we’d miss a few, so thanks to those who brought these to our attention.
Charlie Gibson. With all the grace we’ve come to expect from the media, he edited his interview with Sarah Palin to suit his agenda.
Barney Frank and Chris Dodd. How we forgot them we’ll never know, but they are worthy beyond doubt. Claiming the moral high ground on Fannie and Freddie while lining their pockets with their cash and forcing them to make bad loans (not to mention Dodd’s sweat heart mortgage deal) skyrockets them to the status of uber-douche.
Our winners this week could have easily been any one of the many corrupt Democrats involved in the Governor Rod Blagojevich/Barack Obama scandal, but it’s not. There will be plenty of time to explore their douchebaggery in the future, no doubt. No, this week’s winner is none other than former darling of the left, then enemy of the left, and now darling of the left again – Colin Powell.
What could Colin Powell have done to out D-Bag the corrupt Chicago machine gang, you ask? Well, first off, the corrupt Chicago machine gang hasn’t been convicted of anything…yet. And since the stories of everyone involved keep evolving, it’s who exactly did what douchey thing is constantly changing (never for the better). But Powell’s douchebaggery is crystal clear.
Colin Powell thinks Republicans need to become Democrat Lites, of full-blown Democrats with an (R) after their names like him, in order to win elections. He told CNN that Republicans attempted “to use polarization for political advantage.”
What polarization, Colin? Considering the fact that we just ran a candidate that is a squish on a great many issues, what polarizing moves did he make? How did he not fit the template exactly of what you’re hoping the party becomes? McCain wouldn’t mention Reverend Wright, didn’t bring up race (though that’s all the Democrats seemed to talk about) and didn’t run on gay marriage bans or anti-abortion crap. He even engaged in the Democrat’s favorite past-time, truly polarizing politics, by engaging the same class warfare as the Dems did.
The fact of the matter is Democrats win when they run as though they’re Republicans and Republicans lose when they govern as Democrats. Powell either doesn’t get this fact, or he doesn’t care. Since he’s spoken out on it, it would seem he cares.
So we thank you for your service to our great country, General Powell, we’re going to pass on your advice. We will continue to fight for individual liberty, free-markets and free enterprise. You are free to sell out, though we don’t recall you ever actually having bought in, and free to leave the Republican Party, since that is clearly not where your heart is. (Seriously, why try to change your party into something that already exists in the other party? Just join them.)
As you walk out the door, to jump the shark in our opinion, don’t let the door hit you in the ass on the way out. And don’t forget to pick up your trophy for Douchebag of the Week.
Considering the fact that our winners this week want to “borrow” billions of dollars of our money (not really our money since Congress has already spent all of that and is living on credit, but whatever) in order to feed the same failing machine that brought them to Washington on bended knee in the first place, and have been seeking this “loan” for some time, this honor for Ford, General Motors, Chrysler and the United Auto Workers union is long overdue.
While supports of the bailout have won in the recent past, this honor is reserved for these four groups thanks to their willingness to part with the little bit of unregulated sovereignty they still have (CAFE standards, etc.) in order to suckle the government teet and drain our future even further. Thank you, no.
In spite of the fact that 61 percent of the American people oppose the bailout (oddly, roughly the number of Americans who actually pay income taxes), Democrats in Congress are inclined to grant them the money. Why not, really? So few Members of Congress give a damn about the fact that Social Security, Medicare and Medicaid are already sure to bankrupt the country in a few short years because, hell, they’ll be dead, or at least out of office (with the possible exception of Robert Byrd, who seems eternal), so what’s a few billion more in the grand scheme of things? Why not blow a bigger hole in the Titanic, the thing is gonna sink anyway.
While the CEOs of the once-great dinosaurs grovel for a taste of our cash (after driving to DC in hybrids since their private jet trip went over like, well, pretty much every model of car they’ve produced recently), the UAW has decided to get “serious” about what they’re willing to “give up” in order to save the jobs of their members, the people that really do the work. They’re willing to allow their failing employers to stop paying people for not working. Yay! Very brave stand on their part. Well done. It won’t make a dime’s worth of difference, but what a brave sacrifice.
Why these people don’t stand up and point the finger of blame where it belongs, their inquisitors (and potential future masters) for imposing crippling regulations on their products, will go down as one of the greatest moments in eunuch history.
Not only for their complete lack of testicular fortitude and mismanagement of former titans of American industry, but for seeking to make us unwillingly invest in their failure, the Big 3 and the UAW are our Douchebags of the Week. It’s time to declare bankruptcy, reorganize and, frankly, get their shit together, or go the way of the dodo.
Just for fun, enjoy the picture below of UAW President Ron Gettelfinger contributing to the discussion.
PS – Isn’t if funny how Speaker Pelosi complained about the CEOs flying in private jets? Remember her demand for a private jet, an Air Force plane, so she wouldn’t have to rub elbows with commoners on commercial flights? We would wonder how she could say that with a straight face, but we doubt her face moves much at all…
This is a shortened week this week thanks to the holiday and our travel schedules, but that doesn’t mean there hasn’t been a douchebag worthy of note this week. The winners this week are two staff writers for the Washington Post and the non-profit Bon Appetit Management Company Foundation. You may be asking yourself what two staff writers and a non-profit could have done to deserve this honor while so many douchebags are walking free around the world. Well, in the holiday spirit, they have gone and told you how you should celebrate Thanksgiving.
Not that you shouldn’t celebrate Thanksgiving, though that would be much better for the planet, they want to tell you HOW to celebrate it.
Seems global warming (never mind the fact that the earth has been cooling since 1998 while CO2 output has increased) has impacted the getting together with family and friends to give thanks industry. How? Who cares, it has! Facts be damned!
Simply read the intro to the chart (click on the thumbnail for a larger view):
A holiday all about seasonal food presents a real opportunity to eat sustainably. But making the right choices is more complicated than you think. Should you buy local or organic? Or is what you eat — and how much — more important?
Researchers are racing to find an answer.
Is it really that complicated? No. And who are these researchers racing to find an answer? We’re willing to bet dollars to donuts that the Bon Appetit Management Company Foundation gets some federal funds, if not now, in the near future. What a scam, what a waste of time and money, and who the hell cares?
It’s Thanksgiving, for crying out loud. Will these hippies and government leeches ever stop? No, they won’t. They’re all about the power and having control over you. For this they are truly douchebags. And this week they are the winners of Douchebag of the Week.
Eat well, drink much, have fun and Happy Thanksgiving.
Our winner this week the large group of individuals (though seemingly not as large as the last time this concept won) who support the bailout of the auto industry. Don’t get us wrong, we love the auto industry, but their business model is antiquated and they’re being choked to death by the UAW.
Bankruptcy is the only answer here, and the only hope for the future of the US auto industry. If they don’t restructure, if they can’t reorganize and renegotiate their contracts, be they with the unions or their suppliers, we might as well set the $25 billion on fire because it won’t make a difference. More money won’t make back practices, bad marketing and bad deals good.
Union contracts should not be a suicide pact, but the UAW is using their influence with Democrats to pressure Congress to subsidize the failed business model rather than face the reality of concessions. They are doing a huge disservice to their membership by acting this way and their members will be the ones who suffer by losing their jobs.
There is also the added danger of the government getting involved in the running of a major US corporation. Democrats are calling for the “Big 3″ to submit their plans for the money for approval before a vote will take place. This effectively would give the government the power to tell them how to structure and run their businesses. While few could do a worse job than those in charge currently, the concept of government directly controlling industry should worry every freedom loving individual (though they indirectly control most industry through regulations, this would direct control).
Democrats want this control because they are statists, the Republicans that are going along with this are simply morons.
The auto industry is failing, pouring good money after bad won’t change that. It isn’t their cash flow that has to change to make their business models work, it’s their business models that have to change in order to create some cash flow. Anyone who thinks Congress has the collective wisdom to run these companies in an effective way simply has no concept of history or economics. While government didn’t create the concepts of waste, fraud and abuse, they sure as hell have come as close to perfecting them as anyone ever has. Putting these people in charge of any industry would be like hiring John Wayne Gasey to be the entertainment at a kid’s birthday party. Not the smart play.
Ford, GM and Chrysler need to restructure, regroup and come up with a viable business plan, and the only way to do that is through the protections Chapter 11 afford them.
Anyone who supports this bailout, either elected officials or talking head pundits, you are a douchebag. And this week, you are THE douchebag. Congratulations.
Our winners this week are the Mainstream Media. Why, you ask? It’s because they are now slowly getting around to asking the questions they should have asked months ago, like who is Barack Obama? Since they advocated for him in the election it’s a bit late to ask those questions since they won’t do any good, therefore this ex post facto mia culpa is an attempt to regain some semblance of credibility. It will fail because they have failed.
ABC News gets special mention, and both credit and blame, for Good Morning America’s interview this morning with terrorist Bill Ayers. If he wasn’t worth talking about during the campaign, why is he worth talking to now? The questions asked by Chris Cuomo were good questions, just 6 months too late.
Ayers himself still doesn’t seem to get it, doesn’t seem to understand how planting bombs isn’t a good thing, being associated with murderers isn’t a good thing, but we wouldn’t expect anyone who did that to understand.
The amusing part is to watch Ayers try to explain how he barely knew a man he personally sought out to head the Annenberg Challenge, the $50 million leftist organization Ayers started to radicalize Chicago’s education system. There aren’t many people on the planet who would create a $50 million organization and then simply hand control of it over to someone he barely knew and wasn’t sure was as radical as you wanted him to be.
As more time passes there will be a growing number of stories asking “Who is Barack Obama?” in the news, we may even find out how a failing student with a drug problem got into the colleges he attended and how they were paid for. Who knows? But it’s a day late and a dollar short on the part of the media, they sold out a long time ago and can’t buy back in after the game is over.
For this, for their attempt at regaining credibility (since attempting to regain it is an admission that it’s lost, something they were completely aware of at the time), the Mainstream Media is our Douchebag of the Week.
PS: Don’t expect MSNBC to attempt to regain credibility…you can’t regain what you never had.
You may ask yourself why Jesse Jackson is our Douchebag of the Week this week, what did he do? Well, he’s done a lot, actually, but this award is granted to him for one of the least things he did – cry.
Just a few months ago, Jackson, a well-known race hustler, was complaining about how he wanted to basically turn Barack Obama from a rooster to a hen with one slice of a blade, as evidenced by video #1. Flash to election night, and Jackson was crying like a baby when Obama won. (See video #2)
We aren’t cynical…ok, we are, and you would probably have suspected we’d give the award to the much deserving Chris Matthews for his comments about working to make the Obama presidency work rather than simply report on whether or not it’s working. But not, the current video of Jackson with the hindsight of the “nuts” video, really took Jesse up a notch.
Was Jackson crying because his life-long dream had been realized, or because his life’s work had just been ended? Not really possible to run around complaining about racism when the country is led by a black man. And race-baiting is bread and butter (and, as we all know, the good Reverend has some mouths to feed).
So we can’t tell why Jackson is crying, but we can guess…and it’s not pride. And for that, Jesse Jackson is our Douchebag of the Week. Be prepared to hear either less and less or even crazier things from him in the future as he either accepts that he’s done, or, most likely, gets desperate for camera time the way a heroin junkie jones for a hit.
This week’s Douchebag of the Week winners are real losers, they’re the type of people who do things deliberately to seem different, when it’s really just a childish cry for attention. Our winners this week are any of the boneheads out there who hang politicians in effigy.
It started with Sarah Palin out in California. Douchebag Chad Morrisette thought it would be cool to hang her from his house because, well, he’s a douchebag, and he probably figured he’d get some attention. He did get the attention he desired, but not they type he wanted. He was criticized by anyone with a spine and a shred of decency…and Keith Uberdouche, too.
Now we have two douchebags in Kentucky, Joe Fischer and Hunter Bush, who thought it would be a good idea to hang Barack Obama in effigy. It wasn’t, and they were arrested.
Really? This is what you have to say to the world? You’re content to piss away your 15 minutes of fame on stupidity?
The urge to be shocking for shock’s sake is a powerful one, but so is the urge to try some of the stuff you see on Jackass. Just because you think something sounds cool, smart and clever doesn’t mean it is. These displays are stupid. We get it, you don’t like these people, but hanging their image at the end of a rope is the best you’ve got when it comes to expressing yourself, please, we beg you, don’t vote. You clearly are too dumb to express yourself in any useful or meaningful way, so don’t vote. Just pop your collar, gel up your hair, hop in your Camaro and do the world a favor by driving off a cliff.
And as you go take with you the knowledge that your stupidity and inability to not be a bipedal butt-plug has won you the honor of Douchebag of the Week. Congratulations!
Our winner this week is someone you’ve probably never heard of, Lewis Diuguid. He’s is an editorial writer for the Kansas City Start and a hyper-sensitive left-wing spin-artist.
In this post here, Lewis tries desperately to make the fact that McCain and Palin are calling Obama’s socialist policies what they are, socialism, into a race issue.
When liberals can’t find racism they simply make it up. When there is nothing that can be remotely thought of as racist, they pull out the “code word” card. By their logic damn near anything can be racist. Did you say you wanted a sandwich? Don’t you know that sandwich is a code word for black?
Give us a break!
It’s to the point that if you don’t get down on your knees and kiss Obama’s feet you’re a member of the Klan!
This is why liberalism will fail, because they seek to control every aspect of everyone’s lives and those that don’t fall in line are demonized as sexists, racist, homophobic or whatever floats someone’s boat at the time. And it is this haphazardly usage of serious social problems that cheapens real cases of them, and may well cause many hard feelings and more incidences. It’s absolutely disgusting.
For being a complete jackass so desperate to win this election that he will sell out any an all principles of honesty and integrity, Lewis Diuguid is our Douchebag of the Week.
Our winner this week is someone who has had the honor bestowed upon him once before. Congressman Jack Murtha is a notorious douchebag, known for his ability to bring pork back to his district in near record numbers.
But his pork proclivity is not the reason this honor is his again, it’s because of the stupidity and typical (and often ignored by the media) foot-in-mouthness of comments he made this week that, yet again, injected race into the Presidential race.
Murtha told the Pittsburgh Post-Gazette that voters in Western Pennsylvania are racists who won’t vote for Barack Obama because he’s black. These are the people he represents, which really lets you know not only what he thinks of his constituents, but what Democrats think of people who dare disagree with them.
There are plenty of reasons not to vote for Obama, a dislike of socialism and a love of personal liberty and responsibility being the main ones. But to liberals like Murtha, those reasons don’t exist in their heads, mostly because they live an insulated world filled with sycophants who blow so much smoke up their asses about how brilliant they are that they run risk of colon cancer and don’t spend time actually listening to the people they represent who disagree with them. Their arrogance bleeds into every aspect of their lives and they simply can’t control themselves, nor will they tolerate dissension since they don’t see it in their lives.
Murtha is a disgrace, has been since his time taking bribes in ABSCAM, but this is even over the line for him. Democrats have been playing the race card so often in recent weeks that they must have a race deck. And comments like Murtha’s are getting more and more common, though generally shrouded in code words, but Murtha, who actually is “out of touch” and “off his rocker” (unlike what libs call McCain in subtle ageism attacks), flat-out said what liberals have been hinting at.
For his bigotry and contempt for those he represents, Congressman Jack Murtha is our Douchebag of the Week.
This week’s winner has committed the consummate douchebag move, sticking his nose in where it doesn’t belong. Barack Obama, Senator from Illinois, decided that he was going to interfere with US foreign policy, with war policy, for his own political advantage.
The Washington Times reports that Obama tried to stop the Iraqi government from striking a deal with the Bush Administration so the next President, possibly him, could swoop in and play the hero. This is absolutely disgusting and borderline treason. Is this supporting the troops?
“In the conversation, the senator urged Iraq to delay the [memorandum of understanding] between Iraq and the United States until the new administration was in place,” said Samir Sumaidaie, Iraq’s ambassador to the United States.
This is reckless and dangerous. Obama is not the President, may never be the President, he has no right to play the President, especially for his own political gain.
This was done when it looked like the war was going to be THE issue of the campaign. With the surge working, Obama needed something. If things continued to improve, that would take away his best trump card and he wouldn’t be able to placate the uber-leftists who gave him the nomination by surrendering. Michael “Jabba” Moore, George Soros and those of their ilk wouldn’t stand for success, which would put Obama in a position similar to where he is now, not being able to admit the progress that is being made. So he tried to undermine the efforts of the United States government for his own political gain. Absolutely disgusting.
For this Obama deserves something much greater than Douchebag of the Week, and hopefully he will get that on November 4th. Until then, that’s what he gets.
The funny think about markets is that they work only when allowed to. The crappy thing about politics is politicians rarely let markets work. President Reagan put it best when he said:
Government’s view of the economy could be summed up in a few short phrases: If it moves, tax it. If it keeps moving, regulate it. And if it stops moving, subsidize it.
The government is like a fat guy at a morning meeting sitting at the end of the conference table near the box of donuts and the free-market is the box of donuts. He can’t control himself, he has to keep reaching into the box. Politicians can’t help but meddle in the market in an idiotic attempt to spare us from its cyclical nature. But their efforts end up making things much worse in the future.
We didn’t get to this point from too much deregulation, as many in the media and on the left (as if there’s a difference) would have you believe, we got here because of regulation, threats of more regulation if bad loans weren’t made and threats of more government intervention through civil action.
Also to blame are the people who were specifically exempted from guilt in last night’s VP debate, the people that took the loans. “Predatory lenders” gives the impression of some sort of land-shark roaming the countryside looking for dupes to give money to, but these people have offices. Just because someone got a flier in the mail promising them loans doesn’t mean the idiot who thumbed through the Val-Pac had to take one. Joe Biden said last night that he and Barack OBama want to lower the principle for people who bought more house than they could afford. Don’t you feel like an idiot for having lived within your means these last few years, especially since you’re going to have to pay someone else’s mortgage now.
Back to the bailout. The need to do something is common in politics. Just watch any politician at a townhall meeting. Someone will stand up and tell their sad tale of woe, lost their job, no education, can’t afford this, that or the other thing and they want to know what the government is going to do for them. Never will you see an elected official say, “Nothing, you’ll have to help yourself.” That’s what the Constitution demands, but it’s looked upon simply as a piece of animal skin with quaint scribbles from old dead, white guys on it now. Its bastardization led us not only to this crisis but to every “crisis” in the last 100 years. It was written to limit the power of the government, on that there is no debate, but has been reinterpreted to allow whatever the whimsy of the moment is, especially meddling in the market.
So we find ourselves picking up the $700 billion check on meal we were force-fed, and while we’re getting screwed, it’s not the type you might actively seek. Wall Street wants our money, but they want our money because the sun rose, everyone wants money. But this bailout is not needed, mostly because no one knows what will happen next. As an anchor on CNBC put it the other day:
Let’s not be careful, let’s ride this out, not kick the can down the road for someone else to deal with. Let’s not make it worse. Right now a small portion of taxpayers are caught up in this, don’t involve everyone.
Anyone who votes for this bailout is a douchebag of epic proportion. All this will do is cloud any investigation into how we got here, if one is even launched. Right now there are millions of documents sitting in Fannie and Freddie’s offices that could be destroyed legally because they are not under subpoena. The longer it takes to launch an investigation into the largest scam in the history of the Earth the fewer of those documents will survive.
For voting for a bailout rather than to launch an investigation, every single Member of Congress who votes in favor of the Frank-Dodd-Bush-Bernake plan is our Douchebag of the Week.
Again this week many douchebags emerged to fight for the crown of the ultimate douchebag, but there can be only one winner. (Yes, we know we’ve had ties in the past, but still…) This week’s winners are two groups that function as one, uber-leftists Democracy for America and Brave New PAC.
Never heard of these groups? You’re not alone. They’re fringe groups, one of which is fronted by Coward, er, Howard Dean’s brother James. (As an aside, how much would it suck to have grown up with such a cool name and be such a tool shed? Seriously, this guy is a Home Depot and Lowes megastore combined when it comes to tools.) Oddly enough, federal election law prohibits coordination between campaigns, parties and outside groups, so we’re just absolutely positive the Dean boys never speak about politics.
While simply being a Dean puts you near the top on a weekly basis for the award, James really stepped up his game to walk away this week. Sure, it could have been all the Democrats “negotiating” on the bailout bill to fund their political allies, but this is even doucheier than that.
The ad below is what makes Dean and his goons winner. Oddly enough, McCain gave reporters access to his complete 1,100 page medical file for 3 hours while Barack Obama had his doctor write a letter saying everything is cool, trust me, and McCain is accused of having something to hide. Anyone who supports Obama, a man who seemingly didn’t exist for long periods of time in his own life since he doesn’t talk about them, and wants to accuse McCain of hiding his life can also claim a slice of this D-Bag pie.
Brave New PAC and Fascism, er, Democracy for America, may you suffer painful, long lives for what you do. And until your final breath, may your greatest comfort be that you are our Douchebags of the Week.
If you’ve never seen scare tactics or ageism, here you go.
PS – We think it fitting that this is our 72nd DBoTW tagged post.
Even though there was some stiff competition this week, House Ways and Means Committee Chairman Charlie Rangel wins this week’s coveted DBoTW Award. While we don’t normally reward someone for their long-term douchebaggery, Rangel’s douchey behavior over the years only came to light recently and, frankly, he deserves it.
While that’s a slight overstatement of Rangel’s power, he does have major influence over the tax laws of this country…he just doesn’t follow them.
It has come to light that Rangel has been hiding money, er, forgetting to declare income, for 20 years. Add to that the fact that he purchased the villa with a no-interest loan he claims he had no knowledge of (Rangel is a lawyer. Do you really believe he signed a contract without reading it or seeking the best terms possible? Well, he got them!) and a picture of corruption starts to emerge. This comes as a shock to no one who has even a basic knowledge of how Charlie works and has followed his career, except his constituents who keep sending him back to Washington.
Somebody needs to buy Charlie a dictionary so he can look up the word respect.
But it turns out that Charlie does own a car, several cars, in fact. He’s been illegally parking one of them in the House parking garage for years (though reports say he had it towed the day this story broke), violating both House rules and the tax code yet again! Mel Brooks had it wrong when he said, “It’s good to be the king!” He should have said, “It’s good to be the chairman of the Ways and Means Committee.” Well, we hope not for much longer.
The New York Times, LA Times, Buffalo News, and countless other news outlets have called for Rangel to step down while the myriad of ethical probes look into what Charlie knew and when Charlie knew it, but he has refused. Speaker of the House Nancy Pelosi, herself a past winner of the DBoTW Award, is standing by her douchebag, so far. Time will tell what Charlie’s fate will be, but, according to Democrat VP nominee Joe Biden, he’s not much of a patriot!
Mr. Chairman, for all these reasons, and more, you are by far and away the Douchebag of this week! Congratulation!
To be able to pick just one Douchebag of the Week winner this week would be a Herculean task for which no mortal is up to, so we have a tie. We don’t really like ties all that much, we like winners, but there were so many people who stepped up their game this week that to pick just one would really be a disservice to all the other douchebags who are just as deserving.
So, without further ado, and in no particular order, here are the winners of Douchebag of the Week.
Matt Damon. There really doesn’t need to be much said about DB #1 since we said much about it yesterday. Just think it’s kind of funny that a guy who claims to have the skills of an actuary could fall for an Internet hoax about dinosaurs that we thought so stupid that we made fun of it? Matt Damon can play a genius but he sure as hell isn’t one, he’s a douchebag.
Number 2 this week (pun intended or not, who cares?) is Joe Biden. Why Biden? Well, the gaffe machine was at it again this week when he not only said Hillary Clinton would probably have been a better VP pick than him (we agree but are so grateful that Obama can’t stand her and we got Joe, the gift that keeps on giving), but he also told a paralyzed man in a wheelchair to stand up and attacked Sarah Palin on stem cell research and her own baby. Anyone who says this is a douchebag:
Number 3 this week is New York’s non-hooker patronizing governor David Patterson. He tried to insert race into the race again but failed miserably. How? He accused Republicans of using “community organizer” as a code word for black, therefore the Republicans are racists when they make fun of Barack Obama for having been a community organizer, whatever the hell that is. First off, Saul Alinsky, well known anti-American socialist, came up with the “job” in his his book Rules for Radicals, and Saul was white. Second, who can someone be accused of using code words to bring up the fact that someone is black when it’s pretty clear that the person is black and no one gives a damn? Maybe Patterson has did too much coke and had too many affairs a few years ago…
Finally, number 4. Anyone who has said the line “Jesus was a community organizer, Pontius Pilate was a Governor,” while talking about Barack Obama. He’s not Christ, no matter how much you’d like him to be. Besides, as Jonah Goldberg points out in the print edition of National Review this week, Obama is more like Pilate since he essentially just voted “present.”
All of these people really took it up a notch, and we expect this douchebaggery to continue as election day approaches. Congratulations to all of you, you are our Douchebags of the Week! Well done, DB!
This week’s winner is not one individual, but a group. Once Senator McCain announced his running mate would be Sarah Palin, the Governor of Alaska, they hit the ground running with their attempted smears and fell flat on their faces.
Those small towns with a few thousand people are filled with the people Obama and elitists like him don’t understand, the type they look at as “clinging to their guns, God and xenophobia.”
Now correct us if we’re wrong, but a state senator in Illinois doesn’t represent that many people, and they are not an executive of any sort, so this would count as executive experience and Obama’s old job wouldn’t, nor would his current job. And since no one seems to know what exactly a “community organizer” does, that doesn’t count either.
So will all his past jobs amounting to no executive experience and no real accomplishments, aside from setting a record for voting “present,” what does Obama bring to the table?
Palin brings a hell of a lot more than nothing.
Would they be making these attacks were she not a woman? Probably not. So while Obama talks about equal pay for equal work, he doesn’t mean equal respect for more accomplishments apparently.
Barack, you and your campaign are complete douchebags, and all of you have risen to the level of Douchebag of the Week! Congratulations, it’s the last thing you’re going to win for a while.
Chances are you’ve never heard of this week’s winner, Dave Stancliff, but that doesn’t diminish his douchebaggery. Dave is a Vietnam veteran, blogger and columnist for a few regional newspapers in California, and a raging leftist. But that’s not why he’s our DBoTW.
No, he’s this week’s winner because of this column he wrote for the Times-Standard about McCain’s “possible” post-traumatic stress disorder and how that should pretty much disqualify him for the Presidency.
Does John McCain suffer from PTSD? Considering the hundreds of pages of medical documents released by his campaign, no. (Obama’s campaign released a one-page letter from his doctor saying he was healthy, nothing more. Pretty much the same thing Clinton did, no real records released.) But the mere fact that there is no evidence doesn’t stop Stancliff from speculating because, well, when you can’t win on the facts, just assume facts to plant a seed of doubt in people’s minds. Stalin never let the facts get in the way of a good story (or purge), why would today’s leftists?
He describes what can only be seen as the horror of his own battle with PTSD, which we do not doubt, but then he goes beyond that to assume McCain suffers as well. Why, he wonders, wouldn’t McCain suffer from PTSD if he does, McCain went through much worse than he did, so he HAS TO HAVE IT TOO!
Life doesn’t work that way. People handle things differently. Many veterans, most in fact, do not suffer from PTSD. That is not to case aspersions on those that do, it’s just a fact; people are different.
But even that isn’t why he’s this week’s Douchebag.
He goes on to praise McCain for his bravery and for what kind of man he is, all while assuming he’ll kill us all after having a flashback. Fine, whatever. But a little poking around his personal blog finds that he’s not anywhere near the person he claims to be in the column.
In this post he takes the typical uber-leftist line that if Obama loses it will not be because people reject his Marxism, it’s because white people didn’t vote for him because he’s black.
You’re either for Obama or you’re a racist, period, is where this guy is coming from. The last 8 years, after all, have been the worst in human history, what with the 5.2 percent unemployment and one, count it, ONE quarter of negative economic growth (that constitutes a recession to liberals and the media). Absolute hell!
But he’s not done. To really show his open-mindedness and self-proclaimed “Libertarian” bent, Dave says the following:
“That’s above my pay-grade” is thoughtful? Cowardly, yes, thoughtful? Maybe insofar as finding new ways to avoid saying anything.
Elsewhere on his blog he rambles on about the typical left-wing pap, health care, what the rest of the world think, everything wrong with anyone is someone else’s fault, etc. But the real douchebag move was to try to under cut McCain by throwing out there that he may have PTSD. The Left can’t attack McCain for his military service any more (just ask Weasel-y Clark, if you can find him, after he tried), so they need something else. Why not lie?
Dave Stancliff, there is plenty of things on which you could take issue with John McCain, (think cap and trade) but since you aren’t a Libertarian like you claim, you have to resort to this sort of crap. For that move you, friend, are our Douchebag of the Week.
Our winner this week was a runaway victor, no one came close to Vladimir Putin for pure douchebaggery. Sure, Obama made a lame attempt by having a position on the situation in Georgia, then refining it to make is closer to strong and for his idiotic proposal that senior citizens not pay any taxes. But no, he lost. Even the Chinese gave it a go by sending 10 year olds to pass as 16 year olds to win the gymnastics team gold. Again, and forgive the pun, they fell short.
Putin’s douchebaggery took it to a new level, invading a democratic country and then looting it. While the world condemned the action, the Russians simply are going deeper and deeper.
They can complain all they want about the media being biased against them, sometimes the media can seem biased against the fat kid just by pointing out the fat kid beat up the kindergartener.
The events leading up to the invasion and since are well documented and don’t need to be recounted here, if you think somehow Georgia picked this fight or had it coming, well, we can’t help you.
Vladimir Putin, you are a complete douchebag anyway, but this week you really took it to a new level. Kudos to you, you are our Douchebag of the Week. We’ll mail you the certificate, no need for you to send anyone to pick it up.
This week’s Douchebag of the Week “winner” is a newcomer to the award and you may have never heard of him, but in no way is he less of a douchebag than past winners. Tom Matzzie is the consummate douchebag, a douchebag’s douchebag, if you will.
Matzzie, head of the former “Progressive Media USA” (folded). a group you’ve undoubtedly never heard of unless you are one of the few morons who’ve donated to them, has formed a new soon-to-be-failed group called “Accountable America.” AA (Accountable America, not “AA”) hopes to harass Americans with whom they disagree in order to shut them up and, more importantly, shut down their political voice leaving only left-wing radical groups to speak their minds.
This is typical of the regressive, er, “progressive” movement; if it doesn’t conform to what you want 100 percent it must be destroyed, no one is allowed to speak but them, ever!
Seems Matzzie wants to stop “Swift Boating,” the new catch-all phrase for anyone who dare say anything not positive about a liberal Democrat, a term with which the media completely agrees and embraces when the target is a Democrat but forgets when it’s a Republican. But we’re straying…
Matzzie wants to essentially threaten or harass donors to groups who run ads against Barack Obama and pretty much any Democrat by sending them letters, running ads announcing their names or who knows what else. If the act of harassing someone simply because they disagree with you and have the means and the nerve to say so publicly isn’t douchey, what is?
But the cherry on top isn’t Matzzie’s douchebag borderline fascist philosophy, though that would be enough, it’s the fact that his group, Accountable America, is a 501(c)4 and doesn’t disclose who their donors are! So while he seeks to target right of center donors like Sheldon Adelson and Mel Sembler, people he only suspects might be daring to speak since if they give they give to other 501(c)4s he would have no way of knowing, he is hiding who donates to him.
The hypocrisy coupled with the douchebaggery of what he is doing makes Tom Matzzie our Douchebag of the Week!
It was a close race this week with Barack Obama almost going back to back thanks to his race card politics because, let’s face it, accusing pretty much everyone who opposes you of being a racist is pretty freaking douchey. But no, this week saw a late entrant into the fray walk away with the award: the Oregon Health Plan.
The Oregon Health Plan is socialized medicine for the poor in Oregon, a very left-wing state. Why would a health plan for the poor with Douchebag of the Week? Because, just like every socialized health plan system (Canada, Great Briton, Medicare, Obama’s plan) when the government sets the agenda, determines what will and won’t be covered, people suffer needlessly while bureaucrats cash their checks for acting like mindless robots.
The latest victim of socialized medicine is Barbara Wagner who suffers from lung cancer. She’d beaten it once but, as is too often the case, the cancer returned. As a victim of, er, recipient of socialize medicine from Oregon, she was told that she was pretty much SOL. There was a drug out there for her type of cancer now that would slow its growth and prolong her life, and who knows, there may well be another, better treatment that could save it developed while she was being treated. Only problem is the Oregon Health Plan doesn’t allow that. Terminal cancer, no matter how slow-growing, is still terminal. The state sees no benefit if treating someone who is going to die, and no benefit is code for cost saving measures because “free” medicine always costs more than the kind people have to pay for. Barbara was screwed.
The state was kind enough to inform her via letter that they would provide her with drugs to make her suffering less painful, keep her doped up while she waited to die, and that they would also pay for her to commit suicide with the help of a doctor, just not cover the drug that could prolong and improve the quality of her life. That’s so sweet, isn’t it?
If Obama wins and liberals get the socialized system they want, the one citizens with the means in those countries they use as examples flee to seek treatment here if they have the means, expect to become familiar with letters featuring language like this:
It’s essentially this, “It costs too much to save or prolong your life and we’d rather build bike paths and regulate business than pay for it, but thanks for playing and good luck!” This is all too typical in a socialized system.
Think this is just an isolated case? Ask Randy Stroup who found out the OHP wouldn’t pay for the chemo for is prostate cancer. Tell him he’s an isolated case. Bet you’re half right, he feels isolated as hell.
And what of these great examples of socialism liberals hold up as something to aspire to? Over in England there is the story of Trizka Litton who needed a simpler hernia operation, something done daily in this country on an out-patient basis (you’d run risk of waiting longer for an oil change here than a hernia operation). Well, thanks to rationing, Trizka had to wait 7 months! Actually, she had waited 7 months and had enough waiting, the pain to great to continue to wait, that she mixed up a batch of fake blood and claimed she vomited it up to get emergency surgery.
Then there’s the Canadian health care system, also called Medicare, where until a few years ago it was illegal to pay for something out of pocket if it was covered by their socialized system just to make it fair. That way people who could afford it couldn’t go to a doctor and get cuts in line for their treatment. It’s a fair system, everyone suffers equally. Thankfully that law was overturned and Canadians are now free to buy treatment on their own and escape socialized hell. This has caused outrage among the leftists to our north, seem they prefer a system where a rising tide sinks all boats better.
These are just a few examples of the failures of socialized medicine, there are many more out that you can easily find. But you won’t find them all, and it won’t be for a lack of looking. The most egregious ones result in death, not many dead people can complain, and since their families were kept in the dark about the treatments the doctors weren’t allowed to consider, they know no better either.
The Oregon Health Plan is a cautionary tale for all Americans tempted by they allure of “free” health care for all, or free anything for all; it simply doesn’t work, it’s not “free” and in most cases ends up cost a lot more in more ways than you can imagine.
It is for the plight of Randy Stroup, Barbara Wagner and who knows how many others out there that the Oregon Heath Plan is this week’s Douchebag of the Week.
On a positive note, the evil drug company (don’t you read the papers or listen to Democrats talk about “Big Pharma?) that makes the cancer treatment Barbara needs has stepped up and is giving it to her for free. Those evil bastards! Hopefully another company will be just as “evil” to Randy before it’s too late.
Our winner this week has won in the past and will, no doubt, win again in the future because he is a monumental douchebag. But, as loyal readers know, this award is not given out to the biggest living douchebag on the planet at the end of every week otherwise we’d just call the award The Al Gore Award, it is based upon everyone’s actions throughout that particular week. Barack Obama was the biggest douchebag this week by far, therefore he wins. Congratulations, Barack.
To clarify, Obama didn’t win because he’s on a “give me credibility by proxy” tour of Europe, getting his picture taken with world leaders in the hope that people might see him as one himself, nor did he win because of his idiotic “Israel is a strong friend of Israel” line. Not even his refusal to answer reporter’s questions or even allow them to accompany him on certain parts of his trip for fear of getting an ear full from troops who support the surge, meaning someone who wasn’t hand-picked might have made it through the screening process. No, he’s not this week’s biggest douchebag because of those things, though they do make him one.
He’s the Douchebag of the Week because he scrapped plans to visit wounded soldiers in Germany.
Here’s an idea, Barack, just go on your own with the Secret Service. Blowing them off is not showing them respect, it’s being a douchebag. If you really gave a damn about he troops you would simply visit them and not tell the world you’re doing it. Announcing you don’t want to be recognized for your charity work while talking about it and pointing it out to the world is not charity work, it’s PR.
The Obama campaign tried to spin it as though they were told he couldn’t go because, well, the story makes him look like an ass. But the truth has a funny way of coming out and they now have egg on their faces:
So he could have gone, he just would have had to leave his minions and fawning media sycophants behind to do it and that is just a bridge too far for Obama. What a complete and total opportunistic jackass.
It is for this act alone that Barack Obama is by far the unanimous winner of the Douchebag of the Week Award. Shame on you, Barack!
Barack Obama would be the easy choice for Douchebag of the Week this week thanks to his crying about people daring to take the words his wife spews on the campaign trail seriously and having serious problems with them, but that was out-douchebagged by the media. Sure, Obama’s crybaby act was unbecoming an adult, especially since Cindy McCain is routinely attacked in left-wing blogs to a chorus of silence from the Obama camp, but whatever. Tell your wife to stop saying stupid things like telling poor people don’t work for corporate America and no one will talk about her.
The media wins this week because the “big three” network anchors, and really they are anchors because they’re pulling down their ratings faster than the Titanic sank, are falling all over themselves to jump on the Obama bandwagon and follow him on his Euro-Middle East trip. Katie Couric, Charlie Gibson and Brian Williams will be jet-setting and coordinating with the Obama campaign as he travels the world in the hope of understanding it finally. They will all get exclusive interviews with him, but if history is any guide expect the interviews to be a mile wide and an inch deep, just like Obama.
To save everyone the trip here’s all you really need to know, Barry. England is cool and with us, the people of France all want to think it’s the 16th century and they matter on the world stage (get them off the UN Security Council already!), Germany has no history in their text books between the early 1930’s and the mid 1940’s for reasons no one wants to talk about, but they’re doing ok now. The Middle East is filled with a bunch of people who started hating each other for reasons most of them can’t remember, but since their leaders need to blame someone other than themselves for how horrible the people’s lives are, blaming someone of a slightly different religion is an easy scapegoat. They’ve never known freedom or the freedom from fear, but when they do they will devour it like a fat guy at a buffet. That’s what you need to know.
When the media, who doesn’t bother sending anyone of note along with McCain when he travels for some odd reason, reports on these travels it will be as if Jesus himself has returned to the Holy Land. Don’t expect a word about the show, the spectacle or the fact that Obama simply says things like he wants the world more full of hope and wants to restore everyone’s love for us, there will be visuals of crowds and clips of applause lines, nothing more. Really have to wonder what blue collar workers in the US will think seeing a candidate for President sucking up to foreign populations, can’t imagine that will go over really well.
Anyway, for your douchebaggy, over the top fawning and uprooting your nightly news casts simply to follow Barack Obama on his senior trip to learn about the world, the three major networks are this week’s Douchebag of the Week.
The fact that Speaker of the House Nancy Pelosi is a douchebag isn’t earth-shattering news. If you’re surprised by that the fact that the sun rises in the east probably freaks you out every morning, too. That being said, she really stepped up her game this week.
When Republicans and Democrats were making progress on drilling offshore for oil to cut our dependence on foreign oil, something even Democrats claim to support, she chimed in with her usual level-headed comments.
“This call for drilling in areas that are protected is a hoax, it’s an absolute hoax on the part of the Republicans and this administration. It’s a decoy to punt your attention away from the fact that their policies have produced $4-a-gallon gasoline.”
Well done, Madame Speaker, way to put the needs of the American people ahead of your left-wing constituents. Forget the fact that gasoline prices have doubled since your party took over Congress, it’s the other guy’s fault!
Pelosi is rich, or at least married rich, and lives in a very exclusive area of San Francisco; gas prices don’t mean anything to her, especially since her cross-country flights are paid for by taxpayers. And can you really imagine her going to the grocery store to buy her own food? Hell no! So what does she care? It’s not like her friends are hurting either, you know she doesn’t roll with “average Americans.”
While she’d like to blame Republicans for high gas prices, she may want to look into a mirror (a shatter-proof one, for her own safety) and look at the Democrats. In the 1990’s Bill Clinton vetoed drilling in ANWR because it wouldn’t have an impact for 10 years. Well, it’s 10 years later…and here we are. And now liberals still won’t let us drill in ANWR because it won’t have an impact for 10 years. We won’t have a new fuel source and/or the infrastructure to deliver it for more than 10 years, so maybe we could multitask?
Not according to the Speaker. Which is why she’s a total douchebag and our Douchebag or the Week. Well done, ma’am.
The fact that Barack Obama is a douchebag should come as no surprise to anyone; never before has a scripted puppet come so far without a serious challenge. But this week word got out that he, along with several other Democrats, got a sweetheart deal on a home loan for his million dollar mansion. Now, just to be clear, we don’t begrudge him and Michelle a nice house, they’ve made a lot of money, though most of her contribution came after he secured a million dollar earmark for her employer, oddly more than doubling her salary after that (hmm), and his money started rolling in once he was elected through book deals, which is also odd. But we don’t begrudge them making money, they just don’t seem to want others to. They’re both telling audiences to avoid working in the corporate world, to go into public service and activism. Now, unless you’re working for a sham organization or the head of some group, you aren’t going to make a very good living taking that route, but whatever. If you’re dumb enough to take career advice from a self-absorbed couple like the Obamas you get what you deserve.
Yet, while that contributes to Barack being a douchebag, that’s not why he won this week. He won this week, as we said, because of strange yet lucrative mortgage deal he managed to secure for his mansion, which we’re certain is more house than he needs and is, therefore, contributing to global warming.
Obama spokesman Ben LaBolt said the rate was adjusted to account for a competing offer from another lender and other factors. “The Obamas have since had as much as $3 million invested through Northern Trust,” he said in a statement.
While that is more than enough for the in the tank, on the payroll hacks at Huffington Post, the facts get in the way a bit of this good “they dumped a lot of money into that bank” story. See, they dumped that money into the bank AFTER they got the deal because they didn’t make it until AFTER they got the deal. No bank in the world is going to give you a great rate because you MIGHT or even probably will make a ton of money in the future. Your credit rating and what you qualify for as far as loans go are based upon the past and present, not the future.
Obama can’t explain this away, just like Chris Dodd can’t explain away why he got a sweetheart deal you couldn’t get while writing a bill to bail out the mortgage industry with your money, a bill Obama supports.
This double standard is why Barack Obama is the Douchebag of the Week, and we didn’t even have to consider the fact that Tony Rezko’s wife bought and then sold to the Obamas the empty lot next to their house because it was to be a package deal. That’s convicted felon Tony Rezko, Obama’s long-term friend that he now claims to have very little knowledge of.
You might think this is a rerun of two weeks ago, but it’s not. And while we support the Supreme Court for their decision of yesterday on the Second Amendment, that doesn’t mean they weren’t douchey this week as well, because they were.
The Kennedy in this case, named Patrick, is not related to the Kennedys of political fame, or else he would never have been convicted, but is a 300 pound evil jackass who raped his 8 year old step daughter and was sentenced to death for it, in accordance with Louisiana law.
Well, the 4 liberals on the court, along with the wind-sock that is Justice Anthony Kennedy, decided that the death penalty for a crime that doesn’t result in death in a violation of the Eight Amendment (cruel and unusual punishment for those of you keeping score at home). Yet their majority opinion doesn’t spend a lot of time addressing the Constitutional issues at stake, and never once mentions the fact that treason and espionage are both punishable by death, yet don’t necessarily result in death.
The Gang of 5 simply decided that the Tenth Amendment, the red-headed step child of the Constitution, means even less now. The logic of the decision is so twisted and illogical that Justice Alito wrote in his dissent, “In the end, what matters is the Court’s ‘own judgement’ regarding ‘the acceptability of the death penalty.’…Although the Court has much to say on this issue, most of the Court’s discussion is not pertinent to the Eighth Amendment question at hand. And once all of the Court’s irrelevant arguments are put aside, it is apparent that the Court has provided no coherent explanation for today’s decision.”
The explaination is, to put it simply, that’s what they wanted. They thought it seem exessive, so they wanted to stop it. Read the opinion and see if you can find a Constitutional basis for overturning a state law beyond the wishes of 5 people in black robes.
They are supposed to be bound by and to the Constitution, that’s their job. It’s not to feel or allow their personal opinions to sway their judgment. This decision had nothing to do with law, it had everything to do with their feelings on the death penalty.
The only justice in this case is the fact that child rapists are singled out in prison for special treatment by fellow prisoners. How sad is it that an 8 year old girl may only see the justice the courts were supposed to provider her with from people imprisoned by the same system.
For this reason the same 5 Justices who won 2 weeks ago get another plaque as our Douchebags of the Week. We really, really hope they stop winning next year.
The fact that Barack Obama is a douchebag surprises no one, but it’s not often someone in his position so clearly illustrates their douchebaggery for the world to see and releases a video to try to justify it.
Obama, after promising to take public funds for the upcoming election and supporting public financing of elections, has decided to do the exact opposite and continue to raise cash from whoever will give it to him. This not only means his word is as good as $3 bill, but that we can expect to hear more stories about little old ladies who sold their dentures to be able to send him $20 because they believe in change, or some such crap. (As an aside, what kind of jackass would take money from someone like that? Sure, you have to have an enormous ego to run for President, but to take money from someone who clearly can’t afford it, damn. If $20 from an old lady is the deal-breaker, maybe, but only maybe. It really shows someone’s character to take that money.)
The reason Obama’s word is no longer operative is the evil Republicans will spend money through 527’s and the RNC. Yes, groups like Moveon.org and Moving America Forward are just sitting out there in the weeds waiting to pounce on poor Barack. Oh, wait, those are liberal groups funded by billionaires who never run out of money. Yes, there are 527’s on the right, but they are hardly funded to the degree the socialist ones are, and none are funded by a Bond Villain wannabe like George Soros.
Obama has done us a favor my refusing to take public money, and not just by not pissing our tax dollars away (though it’s kind of ironic that he won’t piss away our tax dollars to run for office, but pissing away our tax dollars seems to be the entire premise of what would be his presidency), but by exposing himself as a man whose word means absolutely nothing when it no longer serves him. So, thanks, Barack. And just to show our complete gratitude, consider yourself the biggest douchebag around today. You’re our Douchebag of the Week.
Here is Obama’s video announcing that his word isn’t worth a bucket of spit. Notice how the greatest orator since sliced bread reads every word from a cue card held just up and to the right of the camera.
Our winner this week could have easily been House Democrats for their taxpayer funded retreat to a luxury spa in Williamsburg, Virgina, but the fact that liberals look at tax dollars as their own money to spend how they like comes as a shock to no one. So, while totally douchey, not really DBoTW level of doucheyness.
